Sunday, June 6, 2010

Magical Moment 122, "Neurotic Crazy"

“There is no substitute for hard work.” –Thomas Alva Edison

My heart tells me this is true, but my mind tells me, ”Maybe you’re not working hard enough. Work harder. Do more. And if you don’t reach your goal, it’s simply because you didn’t work hard enough.”
We’ll see soon enough. Tomorrow, in fact. If I don’t reach this goal, I hope I can handle it. I hope that my reward for recently recognizing my neurotic crazy and trying to correct it, will be to reach this goal. If not, I may slip back into neurotic crazy. But I hope not. But if I do reach this goal, how will I ever learn to cope when I don’t reach one in the future. Maybe I’ll never learn. But I’m trying to learn. I’m doing it again, aren’t I?

C'est la vie. What will be will be. I can say it, now if I could only believe it. Nope, still not there yet. But I’m trying. God, can I have points for trying? I guess we’ll see after today, because points is what I need.